Warning: Long post

ouch. that’s really a hell week for me this coming week. Investigatory project’s due on wednesday[edit]I’m done with my investigatory project! as in just now! haha thanksto those who helped out, Irwin, Gelline, Kikx, Ratz and Ms. Vitug![edit] and here comes Student’s Week, plus, the Carriole Seminar workshop.

Oh well, sigh. I can’t do anyhting about it anyway. I’ll just live with it. *sigh*

on the other hand, I watched “Pasiklaband” in school which was a battle of the bands. ell, I could say that it’s good but i didn’t really enjoyed it. Well, actually, I did but not for the reason that it was a battle of the bands.

I invited a good friend of mine, kuya Gelo to watch and we ended up talking about so many stuff. He’s very intellectual and I admire him because of that. Hmm, I can see eyebrows racing! haha He has a girlfriend, ok? And besides, he’s my kuya!. He has taught me so many things in life. We shared personal views, and it was really fun talking to him. He’s such a great guy. Wanna see him? Click here haha he’ll kill me if he sees this!

Anyway, there’s this guy from a good school here in Antipolo. hmm, how should I begin this? wel,, I texted him asking something and then we eventually became textmates. But one night, I sent a group message and he just showed me he’s “mahangin” haha whatever that means. Let me share it to you:

Me:[gm] gud eve guys! Just came home kain na po kayo dinner wag papagutom

him: nasa ynares ako ngayun

Me: ah tlga? Wow, naman, sayang di ako nakapanuod jan. Fave. ko pa naman na team yan anyway, who r u with?

Him: friends

Me: friends o c gf? joke haha ;p

Him: hindi ko kasama ngayon

Me: ay ganun? sayang naman, date sana! haha joike uli gano na ba kayo katagal?

Him: two month sa 2

Me: anung name? tga school nyu din?

Him: nope. taga SJWMS

Me: ah tlaga? marami ako kakilala dun! anu ngang name? baka kilala ko

Him: Phexi

Me: wow, ang cute, ang lapit ng names nyo ha?

Him: hindi, tawagan lang namin yun. Bawal real name.

Me: y naman?

Him: wag na, my masasaktan jan

Me: wag na, my masasaktan jan- huh?

Him: Oo, wag na, my masasaktan jan

Duh?! What did he mean by that? He thinks I was hurt? Duh?! Now here’s something for you:
Wag ka nang magalala
Hinding-hindi ako inlab sayo
Bakit ba pakiramdam mo pa yata
Lahat kami ay naaakit mo

Please, Please, pakitigil lang please
Ang iyong pagpapantasya
Hindi ka na nakakatuwa
Ipapagulpi na kita sa gwardyang may batuta

Hindi ko talaga ma-gets kung bakit ka ganyan
Ang feeling mo ay sabik sa iyo ang lahat nang kababaihan
Sorry, pagpasensyahan mo na
Mali talaga ang iyong inaakala
Lahat kami ay nandidiri sa iyo
Ikaskas mo na sana ang mukha mo sa semento

Siguro nga naman ay may mga mas pangit pa sayo
Pero at least hindi sila nagpapakyut katulad mo
Nakaka-bad-trip ka, nakakairita tuwing kita’y nakikita
Di ko alam ba’t ang laki ng ulo mo
Magingat-ingat ka, baka ikaw ay sagasaan ko

I got this song from my cousin’s blog haha It’s by Parokya ni Edgar yata haha
Am I mean? haha I don’t care. I must admit, though, that I admire him. But after that? No way, man! Never again! haha

Last na, I passed the USTET! haha

PSS. Check out my bez’s blog! He’s so touching! His first post was a picture of us haha alabshoo, bez!

“Yeah you bleed just to know you’re alive”

mood:ok
singing:these lines from songs:
I know you don’t really see my worth
You think you’re the best guy on earth
Well I’ve got news for you
I know I’m not that strong
But it won’t take long
Won’t take long
from nina’s Someday and these lines as well…
Right now I know you can tell
I’m down and I’m not doing well
But one day these tears they will all run dry
I won’t have to cry, sweet goodbye

and from Avril’s My Happy Ending,
It’s nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It’s nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done

I’m ok now.Better than I was before. I’m learning to live eah day without thinking about him…or them,in that manner.It’s like I don’t care at all. I’m striving to forget about what happended no matter how difficult it will be for me. It’s their life.Their choice.

I think this is God’s way of making me see who me real friends are and who really loves me.I felt betrayed. Yeah, I kept on thinking,“nananadya ba sya?” and then I realize that maybe yes, maybe not.

My cousin told me that she’sprobably like that ’cause she envies me.I don’twant to sound mayabang. I think someone won’t hate you if they don’t want to be like you. so I kinda think she’s right.

But what’s to envy me? I don’t have anything to boast. I’m just,simply being me. That’s all. Me,myself and I. Astrid.No pretentions.No masks. Me. Me. Me.

I learned so many things from what happended. I can’t blame anybody, though because after all, it’s their life.

This week has been a rollercoaster ride for me but now, I’ve shed enough tears and washed away the pains.Things will never be the same again for me and my former friend…if she even considered me one.

There are things that makeme smile. First,family. My familyhas always been supportive.Then, friends.Thanks to sis, jayvee, dane, aghie, jeff,josh,flor, czar, lolah and all the others who showed me that i don’t have to weep over someone who doesn’t deserve my tears. Lastly,my new home! haha

I’ve had the most number of comments here! thanks, thnaks to all those who gave out their comments.Your comments will be returned.i assure you.Thanks a lot.

wee! extra three days of free time! hahaI’m gonna go check out your blogs!

ciao!

this will be the first and last time i’ll be talking about him and her ever again. Pardon me, but I think this will be an emo post

I love him…I think I really do. i keep on denying it to myself but the more I do, the more I know that indded, i do and desperately do. too bad, just when i thought things will be going my way, I stumbled upon the very truth that indeed, he has fallen for her.

I honestly don’t know how i should feel or, if i’m authorized to feel something but I can’t help sobbing, crying in my bed each night when I found out the truth about it. This feeling sucks for the very reason that I don’t have the right to feel this way because after all, we’re just friends. He was never mine. There was never an “us” to begin with.

We can never lose what we never had. Yeah, what a disturbing truth.

I hate him not because of loving someone else but for being too damn nice to make me feel loved when infact, it was just all too platonic. I’m pretty bitter to the girl because she said that she’s not completely happy when I think she is. It looks like a sign of being plastic…at least in my opinion. Lastly, this girl’s best friend is getting in my nevers. Ok, so her “bestfriend” and the guy likes each other but it still sucks when she(the bestfriend) slaps it in my face the fact that he likes her.

So this is it. I’m going to move on now with the help of my friends.

Goodbye for him and to her… i don’t know.

I’m just going to enjoy the last 44 days of my senior year.

Ciao!

wow! this is my forst real post here in wordpress. I’m thinking about moving here soon or getting a blog that’s coded using wordpress.

i’m so hurt right now. It’s because of this guy who made me believe that he likes me when in fact, he likes someone else.

doesn’t that suck? arrghh…. i’m hating it!